Category: Walking in my mind…


Tear drop!


She closed her eyes for some moments. And thought of him. A tear dropped! Her eyes opened, her senses had awakened, something that she didn’t want. No memory of his was ever to pass across her mind again. Why was it so hard to repress the memory.

Another tear! What was she, an object of someone’s desire, or a human with a heart and soul. Could she not be loved back the same way. Why wasn’t her love as disperesed, or altered by other beings that crossed her path. Why had it become enchanted by only his presence.

And a word, an echo from him made her feel like she was walking on the canopy of clouds, the world under her feet, with fresh breeze touching her face. She could tip toe in her white dress and spin in circles, she could feel the softening of her mood and playing of the piano. What had awakened her this way, was her love.

Yet he had left her quietly. For another girl. And gave her the reason to repress the feelings he himself was determined to arouse in her. It wasn’t easy. Neither to accept the loss, nor reach out in thin air. Love can sometimes be a feeling as light as a floating feather, or a curse left after indulging into something forbidden.

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Another world


An ordinary girl sat by her room’s window, staring at the star strewn sky. It was magical enough; just staring into the night. She could lose herself into wondering what was beyond those stars. Another being, another creed… secrets she would never know? Could she ever get a glimpse of another world? Maybe better creatures, who lived in harmony. Maybe her soul traveled every night to another dimension. After-all, how did she go to places in her dreams that she never witnessed while awake. How could she form images of anything unseen in her mind?

Like the dream where she flew right above wet grass. It was so fresh she almost smelt the wet earth. The wind swept across face, her eyes watered with the chill the wind brought, but every moment was pleasurable. As her sight met the gap ahead she realized she was flying on top of a mountain. She looked ahead at water gushing down from the mountain ahead. A massive waterfall. Her eyes dared to look down and saw depth of the waters. Suddenly it was all too frightening. The roar of tonnes of water speeding down, smashing into the river far beneath. Grey clouds above her head seemed to bring far more cold than ever before. Was it possible to fly a little higher? Since the thought of falling down became an increasing fear. She reached higher altitude, the waterfall became smaller and smaller, the sight ahead was of more plain grass and hidden wonders. She wanted to explore this new place.

But an external cue woke her up that very minute. A dream was lost, she was back inside the four walls, back to her normal routine, back to the unpleasantness of competition and drama of this world. But what she saw was more overwhelming than all this. Her heart craved to fly to that world again.

Freedom


I was never a believer

till I glanced out of the window

and I was never a lover

till I peeked closer to creation

I was never a wanderer

till I learnt to change my path

and I was never a meditator

till I looked beyond the skies

my problems couldn’t be more bitter

till I saw them beg for bread

I seeked for the truth

though I couldn’t be addressed

and my hands began to write

before I understood the words

the walls had me confounded

new ways seemed absurd

I joined my hands for prayer

and the burden of defeat was lifted

then the heart played a melody

new life to me was gifted

and everything so ambiguous

became an obvious reason to be

the world seems an open gate

and I learnt the meaning to be free.


There is a yearning to do something. A hope to be someone someday. A reason to be remembered when you leave this world. A reason to be loved and admired. There is a real thirst to be known as someone who is capable. A need to feel free. A need to break the chains and fly. A spark in life, a reason to live, to enjoy life, to feel that you belong and you gave something back.

It’s difficult, to make our own ways in life,while people have expectations from you, people want something back, people make decisions for you, sometimes you are not in control of yourself, you are just a wanderer, looking for temporary happiness to make your each day seem worthwhile.

There is certainly one thing I have learnt in life, that making your own decisions, using your own mind will get you somewhere, otherwise you will just be an anonymous in the crowd. Follow your dreams.

My dream is to be a well-known writer, someone who wrote beautifully, someone who can grasp people’s heart. I want to write fiction, I want to create a beautiful tale, that could maybe distract us from the chaotic displays of this world and lets us imagine something more magical. I hope I will achieve my goals with God’s guidance and be someone who stood out in the crowd.


As the moon kindles the night
As the wind kindles the fire
As the rain fills every ocean
And the Sun the Earth
So your heart will kindle my heart

Take my heart
Take my heart
Kindle it with your heart
And my heart cannot be
Kindled without you
Your heart will kindle my heart


Among hearts of the world,
Among loves, among churls
There are those who hide
Cries within their heart
With their smiles with their laughs
And no body to realize
No hope to re-energize
The emptiness that echoes
From tears of their past

Because their soul has desires
That no one can understand
Like storms among seas
No one to hold their hand
They can’t tear away
The storms won’t stand
Just covering your eyes
Won’t keep away the sand

But Power of the Mighty
Will never escape your grip
The Inseparable friend
In this delusional trip
The help of Divine
Needs no search to find
Look into your soul
It was there all this time
Just make a prayer
A prayer so pure
With a drop of tear
Help is always near for sure.

It’s a promise!